It Was All His Fault Anyway

One of my son-in-laws used to drive a snazzy pickup truck.

That is, until the day he looked down to change a CD and rear-ended a car on the highway.

He was going about 50 mph, so you can imagine the aftermath.

It wasn’t pretty, but no one was injured.

The truck was totaled and for a while he and my daughter shared her Explorer.

That was okay, because the Explorer – while not a snazzy truck – was an acceptable vehicle for a dude to drive.

All was well until the day the “M” word came up.

It was just after the birth of their second child and with only one vehicle the logistics of getting everyone everywhere was beginning to cause problems.

“Let’s get a minivan!” my daughter said, as she was making dinner.

“NO.WAY.” son-in-law replied, firmly, “I’m never driving a minivan. Ever. So, just drop it.”

“What’s wrong with a minivan?”

“Minivan’s are for moms who take kids to soccer practice.  Not guys who watch ‘Black Hawk Down’ in preparation for epic paintball battles with their buddies and come home covered with bruises, exhausted and happier than they ever imagined they could be.”


“Never mind, it’s a guy thing.  And we are NOT getting a mini-van as long as I draw a breath.”

“Fine.”  (which every man knows means – ‘this discussion is tabled for now, but just you wait mister’)

Fast forward a few months and with the money they’d received from the totaling of the truck they decided to buy a second car.  They settled on a little black sporty something.  Not a bad-ass truck, but it would do for a while.  It was dude-approved.

Then summer came and the a/c in the Explorer quit working.  Fixing it would cost nearly a thousand bucks and that was about a thousand bucks more than they wanted to put into a ten year old car.

This is also Texas and if you want to survive the summer you best never be far from a/c of some kind, so driving two kids around without it was out of the question.

“Let’s get a minivan!”




“We need…”

“NO! Drop the subject!”

So, one day I get a call from my daughter.

“Mom! We got a new car! Brand new and I just love it!”

“What did you get?”

“A Volkswagen.”

“Volkswagen?  You mean like a bug? Where are you going to put the kids?”

“No, mom it’s a….hey hubby what’s it called? Right…a Routan.”

“What is that?”

“It’s a minivan….did you hear me? A m-i-n-i-v-a-n.” *snerk*

They say revenge is a dish best served cold, but I think victory tastes sweet no matter the temperature.

Tell me the truth, now.  Does this minivan make me look less masculine?







Posted on December 1, 2011, in Maybe I'm The Only One Who Thinks This Is Funny, Posts, Random Crap and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. ha! I said I’d never drive a mini-van either, until 3 kids, 2 dogs, and a bunch of “stuff we needed to carry around with us all the time” happened. It’s not so bad.


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