It’s a Bear
No, really it’s a bear..or part of a bear anyway and it’s in my freezer at home.
Here’s how these things happen to me.
I walked in the door from work late last week and hubby was looking like a little boy who’d just scored the Topps package with an extra bubble gum accidentally stuck inside.
“C’mere”, he said excitedly waving me towards the garage.
“What?”, I replied as I followed him.
“Look!” he said, as he opened the freezer
*yes, we’ve been married so long we have entire conversations that consist of one-word exchanges – communication-schmumunication*
“Look what the boss gave me.”, he said as he placed a clear plastic bag of a frozen meat-like substance in my hand
“And this is….?”
“Bear meat! Ground bear meat!”
He looked so giddy I didn’t have the heart to say what I couldn’t stop my mouth from saying anyway.
“What am I going to do with ground bear meat?”
*this is the part where I watch hubby’s happy balloon totally deflate*
“I dunno…make chili or stew with it, I guess.”
He snatched the bag from my hand and shoved it back in the freezer.
“I’m sorry,” I said, trying to make up for my obvious insensitivity over the excitement of ground teddy bear, “I’ll use it in the chili, okay?”
“I guess, but boss-man says it tastes kinda gamey so be sure to add a lot of spices.”
“Great. No, really that’s great. I’ve never had bear chili before.” (shocking, I know given that I am a Texan and we are known to be a bit crazy and adventurous when it comes to food)
I hugged hubby and told him to thank boss-man for the bear.
And, now I’m back to my original question – what the hell am I gonna do with several pounds of ground gamey-tasting teddy bear? I’m not sure there’s enough chili powder and cumin on the planet to cover that taste, and I’m not sure I can get past the thought of the doe-eyed look of every cute li’l cartoon bear I’ve ever seen on television and around the Intertubes for as long as I can remember to eat it.
Next year, boss-man, why don’t you try trout fishing instead?