Circular Logic is Circular
Ahhh….tis the season….to park in the next county for the privilege of shuffling down short aisles full of children playing with Every.Toy.In.The.Store., as their harried parents pretend not to notice, just so they can get 37 seconds of peace and quiet before the next round of “Buh..buhh..but I WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANT IIIIIIITT!!”
And I choose to enter the fray. Me. The old(ish) granny who really should know better. Who should have finished shopping – all hail Amazon! – months ago.
But did I? Nooooooooooooooo…not me.
Sigh…oh well, if I had I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to bring you this little tidbit.
So, of course one of my many gran-chilluns just has to have a certain doll.
It’s the “Happy-Go-Lucky-Empty-Adults-Wallets-As-I-Hold-Kids-Attention-For-Five-Seconds-Before-Breaking-Or-Child-Loses-Interest-Or-Both-Dolly”.
You’ve heard of it, I’m sure. Of course you have.
It’s that one toy that will make life complete for the child, and the one toy that cannot be found ANYWHERE after July.
That’s the one I waited until December 16th to look for.
Armed with my trusty iPhone, I headed to the store that assured me (through electronic inventory, which we all know is absolutely based on numbers from 1997) the coveted, holy grail of dolls, was in stock.
Imagine my shock when I found it. Not on the shelf with the tag and a picture of it, but in a completely different area. And, I only found it by accident…after I’d all but given up.
Imagine my further shock to find that this doll in the store was $10 more than the online version of the identical doll at the same store’s website.
No problem, I’ll just buy it online.
It was not available online.
I picked up the dolly, and headed to the checkout lane with a plan. I would show the helpful employee in red shirt and khaki pants (three guesses as to the name of the store now) my phone with the price of the doll and get a discount when I paid.
First helpful employee in red shirt and khaki pants understood my plight – I would buy the doll online if it were available online, but since it wasn’t and it was available at the store, wouldn’t the company like to be a ‘doll’ and give me the online pricing? – but alas, I had to go to “Guest Services” and talk to more helpful, smiling, employees in red shirts and khaki pants (two guesses as to the identity of the store).
“They’ll price match, no problem”, he assured me as I wheeled my cart over to the “Guest Services” counter.
I swear, just as I got close to the counter three other people jumped ahead of me.
Sigh…….my aching feet protested, but I reasoned that if I wanted my $10 off price on this doll I’d have to plead my case at the counter and pay for it there.
So, I waited my turn.
“How may I help you?” the smiling red-shirted, khaki-panted lady said as I approached her part of the counter (you’ve got one guess left, and really??).
I explained the price difference, and she said “Let me see what I can do.”
“Good,” I replied, “especially since it’s out-of-stock online.”
Throwing her hands up, she exclaimed “I’m sorry, but we can’t price match out-of-stock items.”
“Wait, you mean you won’t price match on an item that I have to purchase in the store because I can’t buy it online? Not because I don’t want to buy it online, but…” I waved my phone in front of her.. “because I can’t buy it online?”
“That’s insane…and stupid.”
“I’m sorry ma’am, but..” gesturing like a mime, she made a ‘box’ around her “…back here, that’s all we can do.”
“May I see…” I started as the manager on duty came up.
“How may I help you?” she asked.
Between red shirt and I we explained the situation.
“I’m sorry, but…” she started as I raised a hand.
“Don’t go through it again. It’s not like it’s magically going to make sense if you say it again.”
“I’m sorry, ” red shirt began as she started to put the must-have dolly on the shelf behind her.
“Heyyyyy! I still want the doll!” I said.
“Yes, I do. My granddaughter would never forgive me if I didn’t get it.”
So I paid the extra $10, and got the doll that will be forgotten before the last of the wrapping paper is put in the trash.
I also got a good laugh out of the irony of the situation as I giggled all the way home.
Well played, red-shirted, khaki-panted employees of big box uppity store wannabe.
Well played, indeed.
Posted on December 19, 2012, in Guess You Had to Be There, Things That Annoy, Things That Will Piss You Off, What the flippity-flop? and tagged stoopid hoomin, whiskey.tango.foxtrot. Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.