Apparently, I’m In the Process of Buying a New House
Well, at least the person who answered the phone at Major Plumbing Company thinks so.
For the record, I’m not.
Also for the record, I need a plumber.
And that’s why I called Major Plumbing Company in the first place. The conversation went like this:
Major Plumbing Company Receptionist/Scheduler: Hello, this is MPC, how may I help you?
Me: Yes, I need to get someone to come out and look at a valve in my tub. I can’t turn the water on.
Me: 123 Everywhere, Anytown, TX
This went on for a few seconds, so I looked at my phone to see if it had dropped the call. It hadn’t.
Me: Hello? Hellooooooo?
A few seconds later….
MPCR/S: And when do you close?
Me: What? This isn’t a new house or a sale.
MPCR/S: Can you verify your address again, because I’m not finding it.
Me: 123 Everywhere Court – or it could be Drive, depends on which map you are looking at, Anytown, TX
By now, I figured out the silence was actually my being put on hold. I waited just a few seconds and she was back.
MPCR/S: What is your closing date?
Me: (what the hell, let’s have some fun) November 30th, 1997
Me: This is not for an inspection. This is not a new house, this is not a sale. I need a repair to the valve in my bathtub.
MPCR/S: And who is your builder?
Me: Jack. Mine is the house that Jack built.
MPCR/S: Is it still under warranty?
Me: I wish…but, no.
MPCR/S: And when is your closing date?
Me: January 4th, 2027
I hung up, thoroughly amused and pissed at the same time. Major Company lost out when I called Much Smaller and Local Company and scheduled an appointment in less than one minute.
Seriously, though, how stupid can a person be and still be employed. Because, if that woman is the ‘bar’, then it’s scraping the ground right now.
Posted on January 23, 2013, in Maybe I'm The Only One Who Thinks This Is Funny, Random Crap, Things That Annoy, Things That Will Piss You Off and tagged funny, stoopid hoomin, whiskey.tango.foxtrot, woman, wow. Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.