Daily Archives: April 2, 2013
I’ve been away from here for a few days, for the three of you who may have noticed, and being around my grandchildren has brought some unexpected and hilarious theater which I’m about to share:
Five-yr-old-grandson: Oooh…oooh…I hurt my junk-junk! (after flopping face-first into the couch)
Me: Your ‘junk-junk’?
FYOG: (grabbing his crotch ala Michael Jackson) Yeah, mah balls! I hurt mah balls!
Same FYOG: What if the world were made of peanut butter? (as part of a conversation with me and his big sister, the deathly-allergic-to-peanuts grandchild)
Me: Well, sissy would be screwed.
FYOG: *giggles uncontrollably*
Me: Of course, we could put her in a big plastic bubble to protect her.
FYOG: Then she’d be a hamster! (collapses in fits of giggles)
And then there’s the 13-mo. old who is learning to walk….
She is taking some tentative steps when she suddenly flops forward and faceplants on the only square foot of ceramic tile within 20 feet of her!
Much wailing ensued, and was assuaged with application of my frozen teddy bear ice pack for kids – which she promptly shoved into her mouth to soothe her inflamed gums from the four teeth she has coming in right now.
Conclusion? Being a baby is painful, and flopping on the couch face first will hurt your junk-junk.