I Really Shouldn’t Be Allowed To Go Places Alone

I’m kinda/sorta/maybe in the market to replace the 8-yr. old 165K miles-on-it car that I really do like.   It’s just starting to have ‘issues’, and much as I hate break-ups I hate breakdowns even more.

Besides, at my age, my ass/back needs something comfy to sit in when I drive.  And with the elebenty-hunnert grandchildren around these days we need something larger.

After much looking around the ‘Net I decided I want a Chevy Traverse.   Hubby is underwhelmed at the idea of getting into payments again, so he has thus far refrained from shopping or test-driving.

I blame him for what happened Tuesday.

I found a very nice-looking Traverse with low mileage and a great price at a dealership near my house, so I decided to go by there and test drive it on my way home.

I’ve always been one to engage in the idle chatter that a used-car salesman will instigate the minute you get inside the vehicle for the test.  This time I was tired, and I was trying to get a feel/listen to the Traverse, so I was silent.

ChattyBoy was not…so, he only has himself to blame for this:

ChattyBoy (CB):  This is a nice vehicle, isn’t it?  And you just never, ever find one for under $20K anywhere. Not ever.

ME: *silent as I’m navigating the turns out of the parking lot onto the street, but I notice there’s something ‘off’ about this vehicle*

CB: Nosiree, never one this low-priced.  And…umm…it’s really nice, not scratches, no dings…..

ME: *except the scratched-to-hell inside of the back hatch door, and the chunk missing from one of the third-row seat backs and there’s something wrong with the way this thing handles*

CB: …and an exceptionally nice ride, for what’s basically a large SUV…handles pretty well, doesn’t it? And, the price! Can you believe it?  Did I mention it’s also a ‘Certified’ vehicle? Yep, it goes through a 177 point inspection.  All that for a remarkable price.  So, what’s your budget?

ME: *finally speaking* I don’t have a set budget, it depends on the vehicle and there’s something really wrong with the suspension or else one of the right-side tires is in the shape of a football.

CB: *after a few seconds* You may be right.

ME: 177 point inspection? Really?

CB: *beaming*Yep, it’s got an extended warranty and it’s Certified.

ME: 177 points, and yet the mechanics missed the fact that one of tires may be in the shape of a football…or, there’s something much larger going on and that’s a big problem.

CB: *nervous laughter* Yeah, sometimes I wonder where the mechanic’s heads are at.

ME:  So, if they missed this big a problem, what kind of confidence can I have that any of the other 177 points were addressed?

CB: *silence*

ME *on a roll now* And while we are at it, I’ve seen plenty of vehicles at or below this one’s price.

CB: Really? Where?

ME: At other-much-larger-dealership nearby.

CB: *sulking* Well, yeah..but they do a huge volume…

ME: Look, bud, you’re the one going on and on about pricing…and you know what? I wouldn’t pay that for this vehicle. It’s beat to hell, drives like it’s run the Baja, and is the most vanilla version of a Traverse.

By this time we were back at the dealership and he almost waited for the car to stop completely before getting out.

I walked into the showroom with him as he kept apologizing for the lousy condition of the car and promising it would get fixed.

CB: So, if we fix the problems, how much would you be willing to pay?

ME: No more than $13K (the sticker was $16.5K)…and I mean not a penny more.

CB:  *looking crestfallen* I’ll call you.

ME: Yeah, you do that.

As I left I realized I’d just come across as the biggest bitch on the planet, and I also realized I don’t give a shit.   I’m there to spend money, my money, and it’s going to be on my terms.

But, I have to admit I’d of been a lot less bitchy if hubby had gone with.   He’s the voice-of-reason, and my warrior and protector.  ChattyBoy wouldn’t have tried so hard after Hubby gave him that sideways glance the first time the car wonky-wooed to the right.

I told hubby about my adventure when I got home and his only response was, “You really shouldn’t be allowed to go places alone.”

Can’t argue with that logic.

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Posted on April 18, 2013, in Guess You Had to Be There, Posts, Random Crap and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 7 Comments.

  1. Personally, I think that was pretty awesome. I’ve never gone car shopping alone. I’ve never really had the input on any car purchase made, either. Awesome of you to put him in his place. I hate slimy sales people.

    • Thank you, Meg! I’m finding that as I get older I have less and less patience with the fools I encounter. And I’ve always been one to speak my mind. You add the two, and well…this happens. 🙂

  2. Excellent! I wish I could have seen his face!

    My grandmother used to go car shopping alone with cash. Doesn’t sound odd today but this was back in the 60s or very early 70s. Some dividend or something would pay out and off she’d go to replace her station wagon with another one. She negotiated like a champ. I went with her once but I was still wet behind the ears and didn’t really pay much attention. My strongest memories of that day are being B O R E D and then driving off the lot in a brand new car with Grandma at the wheel. I’d take her with me car shopping in a heartbeat if she were still around.

  3. Well done, CJ!

    My best used car buying experience happened years ago. I’d done my due diligence about brand, model, year, and such, and knew exactly what I wanted. More importantly, I knew what I didn’t want which is the devil to a used car salesman! H and I walked into a used car establishment, and I responded with what I was looking for to the salesman’s initial greeting. His conversation and information was directed at H even though all the interest and questions were coming from me. (Begin “grrrrr” here)

    He had an interesting one on the lot, so we went into his office to talk turkey. I told him I had cash and named a price. He chuckled (his first response directed to me) and informed me that Blue Book (opened on his desk) for that model was a great deal more. I disagreed. He look at me and said, “Little Lady, I’ve been selling cars for blapity-blap years, and I know how they are priced.”

    I heard, out of the corner of my ear, H suppress a snort/laugh/wheeze. I stood up, leaned over the salesman’s desk and flipped the page back one, saying, “You might try reading the right page, then.”

    Little lady, indeed. And don’t “F” with a woman who has been reading papers upside down on the boss’s desk for 25 years! He didn’t make the sale that day. 🙂

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