Daily Archives: June 9, 2014

It Started Out Weird, and Got Weird-er

I missed the first few texts, because it was late and you know, ninjas…

“Hi”

“Um..”

“Are we just going to stay in this awkward place, where we don’t talk ever?”

“Please talk to me.”

“I miss u.”

“Alec?”

And that’s when I picked up my phone off the charger and realized I had suddenly become a teenage boy named ‘Alec’.

At first I giggled, and briefly contemplated being ‘Alec’ for the lovelorn, but then decided I’m not mean enough, so I picked up the conversation with…

“Sorry, wrong number”

“Cut it out Alec”

“Wait, is this seriously the wrong number?”

“Yeah, sorry.”

“Oh, ok”

“Sorry.”

“No problem. Good luck”

“Alec, stop it”

*sigh*

“Ashley gave me ur number and ur just tricking me”

“Look, you have the wrong number. Check with whoever gave it to you. I’m a grandma, not a young man.”

“Alec, seriously stop it.”

*SIGH*

“No, you stop it. I am NOT Alec.”

At this point, it’s nearly 11:00 pm and my hubby says, “Just turn your phone off.”

“No, I’m not going to be held hostage by a lovesick teenager.”

He shakes his head.

My phone’s text sound goes off again…

*ding-ding*

“I memorized ur number, and that is it.”

“Fine. Call me then.”

“Ok”

My phone rings, and as I pick up to say, ‘Hello’, I hear an audible gasp on the other end.

“See?” I said, “I am not Alec. You are texting the wrong number. Stop it.”

*click* – she hangs up, so I text her…

“See? I was not kidding.”

I put the phone down, and think the whole thing is over.

Ten minutes later….

*ding-ding*
Sonofa……….

“Ma’am, I am so sorry.”

“It’s okay, honey. And I wish you luck.”

“Thanks”

The next day…
*ding-ding*

“Alec?”

“Still not Alec.”

“Alec, who answered your phone last night?”

“Me.”

“No, it was a woman”

*okay, feck it, I give up*

“Yes, there’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you for a long time…..”

Aaaaaaaaaaand scene……….