Monthly Archives: December 2015

Merry Hallowthankmas!

It’s that time of year, when bloggers post either sappy, sentiment-filled thank yous and I love yous to all their devoted readers.

But, that just wouldn’t be me.

So, keep the merry in your Christmas,

The happy in your New Year,

And most of all, keep your nuts away from the fire.

Have a good one, see you next year.

Phrase Dujour

There’s this thing, called the Internet, that is truly one of nature’s most amazing black holes ever.

I mean, one minute you’re asking Aunty Google about where to find the best gingerbread cookie recipe, and the next thing you know you’re reading about famous gingers in movies – my personal favorite being Maureen O’Hara.

Hours can go by and before you know it, it’s time to go home and you won’t even be in the running for Most Productive Employee this week/month/year.

Oh well, might as well console yourself with trolling comments on hilarious Amazon products – like uranium and unicorn in a can (go look, and don’t say you haven’t been warned) – or watching BuzzFeed videos and then accidentally coming up with:

“The Most Awesomesauce Phrase of The Day” in the comments.

Today’s phrase  was about makeup application, and one commenter was lamenting the cost of makeup and how if she put it on she wanted it to be seen, dammit…so she said:

“…put that shit on like you’ve been slapped n the face with a PopTart ladies…”

…………..aaaaaaaaaaand scene

 

When You Least Expect It

I was having a grumpy day.  I was hurting, I was tired, blah, blah…

And, I had to go to the post office as the last errand of my busy work day.

I got there and noticed people walking up to the door and stopping.  After a few seconds most of them turned around to leave. When I got close enough I saw why.  The big sign proclaimed the credit card system was down, and only cash was accepted.

Who carries cash anymore? Not me..that’s who.

Grumbling, I went back to the car and asked Auntie GoogleMaps where the next nearest post office was.   I found it and set off, at least happy that I was heading in the direction of home.

I got to the next post office, and apparently ALL THE PEOPLE who’d left that last place had gone there.  The line was out the door.

Now, I was really starting to get annoyed.

Fine, I thought, I’ll just go to the post office near my house.  This post office is right out of the 1940’s.  They staff is very small, usually very sour, and very slow, and on any given day there’s an incredibly long line.  At least it was close to home…so, there’s that.

Imagine my surprise when I walked into the post office to see only two people in front of me.

Imagine my further surprise to hear a man’s voice.

Singing.

He was singing Christmas carols.

He was very good, too.

Looking at the line of folks, I thought for sure it was one of them.

I also briefly wondered if I’d forgotten to take my headphones off, and was the singing coming from them.  Yes, I do stuff like that. All. The. Time.

Nope, it was one of the clerks behind the counter.  He was young-ish (but then, face it, I’m old and the young-ish are getting younger-ish every day) and had full-sleeve tattoos, large rings in his earlobes, and a shaved head.  He was delightfully full of sparkle.

When it was my turn he greeted me enthusiastically, asked about my day as though he really cared, and proceeded to serenade us all as he completed my transaction.

I left there with a big smile on my face, and a decidedly springier step.

I’d been so annoyed at having to search for a simple post office, and the quest had led me to a very sweet place.

It just goes to show you, when you least expect it……..