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There are two kinds of people in the world, those who love ALL THE HALLOWEEN THINGS, and those who listen to One Direction.

I’m of the former.

This year All Hallows E’en falls on a Saturday.  This is like being told you just won the lottery and your check will be delivered by a half-naked Jensen Ackels.

Preparations for this year’s festivities have been going on in the family for weeks.  Make-up effects have been tested, costumes have been purchased, tried on, altered, and provided the correct accoutrement – be it badassery or cute – to enhance the experience.

I usually dress as either a witch or vampiress.  The makeup is the same for both, as is the hair, just the dress changes and the hat. What’s a witch without a hat, I ask you?

This year, in his grandfather-ly exuberance, the hubby has told ALL THE KIDS that we will attend their festivities.  These kids do not all live together in a big commune.  They’re separated by miles and miles.

Sometimes, he doesn’t think things through.

So, I’m forgoing a costume this year, given the fact that I’ll be in and out of cars and houses and running up and down streets with mass quantities of urchins following me.

Except, I have a Black Widow t-shirt so if I can find my black sweat pants I’ll be going as Natasha Romanoff, post workout.  I’ll even pull my hair back, add a bandana and scrub the make up off. I may even add my weighlifting gloves just so it looks legit. If I can find them.  Not that I don’t weighlift, I’m just so much a badass I don’t wear gloves, bitches.

And WordPress insists that Halloween, accoutrements, Ackels, and badassery are all a) not words and b) incorrectly spelled not-words.

I’ll give them all the above, so long as I can keep the Ackels.  Eff you WordPress, he’s mine.